I am 17 years old. I live in a full family, everyone close to me is alive, I have a good relationship with everyone… except my father. In my short life I didn’t know him at all, I have nothing to talk to him about. If I do start to tell him something, he usually doesn’t listen to me, or interrogates me with such idiotic questions that you realize he’s not interested at all. He’s going to shut his ears a little bit more.
Not only that, he is terribly nervous. Anything at all, he gets hysterical and screams. I don’t know how he still has any friends if he yells at them mercilessly and has no patience. You’re afraid to say something to him, he can burst out screaming. Not only that, he’s also a drinker, goes on binges, sometimes for weeks at a time… It’s terribly hard to live on my nerves all the time, that he’s driving around in a car somewhere barely alive.
Not only that, he is terribly nervous. Anything at all, he gets hysterical and screams. I don’t know how he still has any friends if he yells at them mercilessly and has no patience. You’re afraid to say something to him, he can burst out screaming. Not only that, he’s also a drinker, goes on binges, sometimes for weeks at a time… It’s terribly hard to live on my nerves all the time, that he’s driving around in a car somewhere barely alive.
Of course, he says he loves me. He built me a house, builds me another one, says he does everything for me, but I don’t feel his love! I’ve never once had a heart-to-heart talk with him, and we never have a normal conversation. I often catch myself thinking that it would be better if my father didn’t exist at all. It is very hard to live with such a man.
I think that’s the reason why I don’t build relationships with guys. I’m becoming a man-hater. I’ve never had a dad. There’s only my father, who I don’t love at all.
No Comments
Leave a comment Cancel